Spending time

Spending time with Jesus, should transform us. People should know when we have been in the word, in prayer…not by our words, but by our hearts and actions. Transform me Jesus….

https://abide.co/prayer/61q64v

When I look at how my life has been transtormed over the years, I know that it is only by the grace of God.

Impossible, not impossible.

Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.”
John 14:21 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.14.21.NIV

As I read this, my thought went to God’s commands…

And God spoke all these words: “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. “You shall have no other gods before me. “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. “You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name. “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns. For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy. “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you. “You shall not murder. “You shall not commit adultery. “You shall not steal. “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor. “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.”
Exodus 20:1‭-‬17 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/exo.20.1-17.NIV

I then immediately thought that I can not keep these commands…. especially the heart of the commandments. If we did as a “people”, there would be peace… love one another…. love your neighbor as yourself…. I get along just fine with neighbors and people I think are nice…..it is the crazy people that have either lied about me, or has been so twisted in their thoughts that they too believe their lies….those who call themselves believers but do everything they can to destroy me, and what God has done through me, those are the people that I struggle with loving…

Lord, I can not do it on my own. I also don’t want to pray this prayer, because when I do, I am tested. And sometimes (ok, all of the time), I become anxious just by the thought of the test to come. Father, I cant do what you have called me to do, on my own. I need you to intervene. I need you to fill me with your spirit Lord. I need you to miraculously love people through me.

I give you this school year. I ask that you would guard my heart and my anxious thoughts. That you would fill me with your spirit. That I would be full of your peace, love, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self control.

Show yourself to me.